A Break Up without the Make Up

It's been more than a year since I've made this blog, and I'm just now writing my first post. If you ask me, I'm actually quite happy about that. A post by me one year ago would have sounded novice, and not that I don't right now, but this past year has proved itself quite the challenging one; and I'm not who I was a year ago. Twenty-one to twenty-two was more of a jump than I was prepared for. Or even 20 to 21, for that matter. On this day last year I was losing my friends, committed to a relationship and a man that had me dig my own grave, and I bought into all of it. Today, I'm single. I'm alone, something that doesn't necessarily happen very often in my life, but I can say I'm proud of it. I haven't felt this way since my first break up with my first boyfriend ever, my "first love," if you will. I was 15-years-old. I was devastated. I cried for about three days straight, and then I simply had no more tears left. So, I think I figured if I have nothing left in me to cry, then I might as well be happy starting today. It's nice to look back on that break up; to remember my heartache, though young and naive; because I know today I can get through it. This is a new beginning of a life that I now have 100 percent control over. Seven years ago, I was 15. In seven years, I'll be 29. I'm sure I'll look back to when I was a young 22-year-old girl dealing with my break up with... we'll call him Pat... and laugh, at the significantly insignificant break up I'm going through. Significantly insignificant because this is a big moment in my life; I've learned a lot; but it's only a stepping stone. Once I've stepped onto (or over) the stone, this phase of my life will be over. Time and patience are crucial right about now; and music. That being said, I'd like to dedicate my blog to this song, the one song that helped me through my first break up: Mr. Rainmaker - Warrant. I'm a free girl right now. I have the world on my shoulders. The world is my oyster. I can do what I want. Embrace yourself and only yourself for right now. I think I'm learning to love lonliness. SG